Tag Archives: Relationships

Our Times versus Their Times

Why the times have really changed.

I believe that we are not far off from the sort of way our parents were in their heyday. Fair enough – we consume far more media and have access to that angelic demon called the internet where one can learn to create a bomb using household contents or find the words to express how they feel about someone.

I’ve observed how mobile communications devices – tablets, cellular phones, computers, etcetera – pose a huge risk to many a relationship that are business-related all the way to the most personal of relationships. The reason is because, well, it is fairly simple to reach people in different places and therefore just as simple to breach many forms of ‘contracts’. Don’t get me wrong – there is the human element. People make the errors and not the devices themselves in the same way that guns don’t kill people, but people kill people. Well, regardless, the very device you can’t live without results in you living without certain people and things it affects.

Another big difference in ‘the times’ between our parents and us? Travel. It is now no longer a full day’s drive to move from Pretoria to Polokwane. From 3 to 5 hours you can essentially move halfway across the country. For a few hundred rands you can be in Cape town in 6 hours or less. What does this equate to? The ability to reach an infinitely larger audience. Sometimes this audience is in the form of the opposite sex. The opposite sex which is likely easy to conceal whatever you ‘left behind’. Therein lies the problem.

Essentially I have only identified 2 things – travel and communications. Two things that literally and figuratively drive the entire planet. And many relationships apart. From toll gate slips, SMS messages, emails or merely sending a message to an unintended recipient. These simple examples are the downfall of many.

Car Cellphone. Quite… Fitting.

Imagine how much simpler our lives would be if we could not date girls in the next city? Okay, the thought of that is quite sad, but you get my point. So, stop comparing us in the here and now with them in the then and there. Some of “them” are in the now and the divorce rate is a clear indication thereof. Oh, people need to exercise self-control and be responsible for their actions? Well, it is not by chance that people from every kind of walk of life land up with similar relationship challenges. From the very rich to the poor. In cities and in remote villages. The opposite sex and in some cases the same-sex who actually do the responsible thing 9.9 times out of 10, but it is without a doubt that as any goal keeper can’t keep every shot at goal out that 0.1 times out of 10 one will bypass your last line of defense.

I am of course not condoning nonsensical behaviour, but merely stating my observation. Play safely!