Street Vendas*

This here post has nothing to do with the Venda ethnic group in South Africa, but everything to do with a chap who went onto the South African Idols back in 2010.  Being welcomed into the room he gets asked by Gareth Cliff about what he does.  He explains how he’s running a small business selling sweets and stuff.  Gareth therefore asks: “So, you’re a Venda?”  The very surprised young man is surprised and replies: “No, I’m not a Venda.  I’m a Zulu.”  I absolutely died.  Actually – watch the 22 second clip here.


Now, imagine you were a street vendor.  What would you sell and where would you be located?  I have to admit – standing in the sun all day, ducking all kinds of vehicles and taxi driver stunts in order to make ends meet would be a tall task for many of you!  Especially those of you who are physically bigger targets… I JOKE!  What would you sell if you could sell something though?  From the crew selling “cool time ice lollies” for this here African sun to Lewis* Vetton* bags at the intersection of William Nicol and the N1 Western Bypass to swimming pool inflatable jackets to wall clocks to news papers to mobile phone accessories to battery-operated toys for children to fruit basket to coffee and tea to soft drinks to sporting team outfits to selling dance moves to selling jokes… MAN!  What pushes this to be all viable?  Only two things (I think) – traffic and putting food on the table without resorting to crime.  

Yes, of course the police will confiscate your goods every now and then – that comes with the territory!  Especially the fake DVDs, my guy.  I would definitely sell fruits and some vegetables.  Perishables aren’t something I’m fond of keeping in my residence, but they’re healthy!  Healthy people are smaller targets!  Smaller targets are easier to duck on the road!  I JOKE AGAIN!  HAHAHAHAHAHA!  I take it back.  Location?  Anywhere really.  I’m quite fond of corner William Nicol and Fourways/Sunrise Boulevard though.  Traffic aplenty – vehicles and pedestrians.

“Grapes Thirty Rand!  Grapes Thirty Rand!  Grapes Thirty Rand!” – me.  At my corner.

 Well packaged.  Fresh.  Rocking my sunscreen (skin cancer in SA is ranked #2 in the world – for real!  See here)  and working my best whistle.  Making that R200-800 profit per day when the weather and traffic allows…  then to sing on Idols SA in 2015!  *insert air punch here*


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